Feeling Silent.........

The Right Moment

When my husband and I decided we were going to have children we knew it would come at a cost. My husband is a chef and works LONG hours and I was a singer & singing teacher so my busy times were the same as my husbands. It was never a question of childcare. Apart from the fact that childcare hours do not match up to the evening/weekend work we both did, I knew that I wanted to make a full commitment to being a full time mother, at least for a few years.

I have my weeks where I miss work. I miss my "old life". Like this week, when every second person has asked me if i'm singing in this, would I sing in that and I think to myself, God am I insane? I spent 20 odd years of my life training and working for that dream career that I handed away to meet my other desire of having children.

Tonight, when I was giving Amelia her bath that thought crossed my mind and I looked at Amelia. She was sitting looking at me, with a HUGE smile on her face and a beard of bubbles. How about that timing.

All my life I wanted to sing and be a mom. I never knew i'd have to choose and yes i've given up everything to be a mom and my husband still has his career but when I think of someone else having those little moments with Amelia or someone besides us putting Amelia to bed I know i've made the right choice.